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Yesterday I went to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
limenal's apartment and spent two hours washing her dishes in exchange for: two pairs of gay jeans with holes in the crotch, some resume paper and envelopes, a big diner lunch, and a conversation about Six Feet Under. That seems more than fair. I should do more bartering in my life, though I'm not sure how the gas, electric, and phone companies would take it. I am preparing a barter trade for my therapist though, at least until I start pulling in more regular money.
I feel like all I've done in the past couple days is ride my bike and drink coffee. Both are enabling me to get reading and writing done. Last night, after being distracted bydrinkasyoupour for awhile on IM, I churned out this stellar work sample in an attempt to get this project assistant gig with the attorney/lobbyist. Instead of interviewing the 30 candidates, he decided to ask us all to complete the same task by a certain time. He wanted it by Saturday morning. I e-mailed it last night. Not only did I go above the minimum asked for on the project itself, but I outlined in a memo what my process was and how I'd proceed to finish the project. Then, in the e-mail, I discussed how I could make his website better. I did all this in just under 2 hours. I think last night I had never been more ambitious in my entire life, which is strange because it didn't feel abnormal so it must not really be true. I think I minimize too much.
This is the real reason why it probably felt significant: I can bust my ass no problem, but usually it's for gigs or projects I've already been assigned. This is the first time I've made a full-on attempt and bid at a job I've not yet landed, not selling myself short or only trying in a half-assed way out of fear of not getting it. Yeah, it'll suck if/when he decides to go with someone else. But at least I reaffirmed that damn, I can do some shit. I may berate myself for being lazy and uninspired because I take a nap every afternoon and occasionally get sucked into watching Ellen or porn or spending too much time on livejournal, but when it comes down to it, I got big plans and ideas and I can put them in place. Fck this waiting around I've been doing.
See, here's where the coffee factors in. I think I'm totally strung out on caffeine. And it's giving my delusions of grandeur. I'm hoping it's just inducing a hyper mania state, in which case I want to get as much done as possible before crashing.
Last night I said goodbye to a couple people who are going away, one coming back soon, the other, not if he can help it. I think goodbyes are extremely important, and I have a strong sense of closure that pervades my necessity for it -- I have a hard time if people hang up phones too abruptly or angrily, for fear it could be the last time we talk. But aside from the closure aspect and the desire to communicate to people on a regular basis that they are important in my life, I don't get too worried or upset by the actual goodbye's and absences. I don't get wrapped up in when I will see them again or whether it could possibly not happen. Maybe because last night I walked into a bar and sitting two tables over was a woman from college who I haven't seen in five years and I didn't go talk to her since most of my memories of her weren't particularly favorable, but I think, if the universe makes our paths cross again, I'm sure it will happen more often with the people I love.
limenal's apartment and spent two hours washing her dishes in exchange for: two pairs of gay jeans with holes in the crotch, some resume paper and envelopes, a big diner lunch, and a conversation about Six Feet Under. That seems more than fair. I should do more bartering in my life, though I'm not sure how the gas, electric, and phone companies would take it. I am preparing a barter trade for my therapist though, at least until I start pulling in more regular money.I feel like all I've done in the past couple days is ride my bike and drink coffee. Both are enabling me to get reading and writing done. Last night, after being distracted by
drinkasyoupour for awhile on IM, I churned out this stellar work sample in an attempt to get this project assistant gig with the attorney/lobbyist. Instead of interviewing the 30 candidates, he decided to ask us all to complete the same task by a certain time. He wanted it by Saturday morning. I e-mailed it last night. Not only did I go above the minimum asked for on the project itself, but I outlined in a memo what my process was and how I'd proceed to finish the project. Then, in the e-mail, I discussed how I could make his website better. I did all this in just under 2 hours. I think last night I had never been more ambitious in my entire life, which is strange because it didn't feel abnormal so it must not really be true. I think I minimize too much. This is the real reason why it probably felt significant: I can bust my ass no problem, but usually it's for gigs or projects I've already been assigned. This is the first time I've made a full-on attempt and bid at a job I've not yet landed, not selling myself short or only trying in a half-assed way out of fear of not getting it. Yeah, it'll suck if/when he decides to go with someone else. But at least I reaffirmed that damn, I can do some shit. I may berate myself for being lazy and uninspired because I take a nap every afternoon and occasionally get sucked into watching Ellen or porn or spending too much time on livejournal, but when it comes down to it, I got big plans and ideas and I can put them in place. Fck this waiting around I've been doing.
See, here's where the coffee factors in. I think I'm totally strung out on caffeine. And it's giving my delusions of grandeur. I'm hoping it's just inducing a hyper mania state, in which case I want to get as much done as possible before crashing.
Last night I said goodbye to a couple people who are going away, one coming back soon, the other, not if he can help it. I think goodbyes are extremely important, and I have a strong sense of closure that pervades my necessity for it -- I have a hard time if people hang up phones too abruptly or angrily, for fear it could be the last time we talk. But aside from the closure aspect and the desire to communicate to people on a regular basis that they are important in my life, I don't get too worried or upset by the actual goodbye's and absences. I don't get wrapped up in when I will see them again or whether it could possibly not happen. Maybe because last night I walked into a bar and sitting two tables over was a woman from college who I haven't seen in five years and I didn't go talk to her since most of my memories of her weren't particularly favorable, but I think, if the universe makes our paths cross again, I'm sure it will happen more often with the people I love.
