![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Today was drama day in the office, as the floater told someone "fck you". This happened not too far from my desk, but I missed it as I was in office services eating a cookie bar with the records person and making her guess all the ingredients I put in it. Last night I made Kitchen Sink Cookie Bars that contained chocolate chips, peanut butter, coconut, coffee, walnuts, cinnamon, nutmeg, oatmeal, and a bunch of brown sugar and butter. They are good as hell.
So yeah, office drama. Soon I will not really be privy to such things as my hours switch to nights on Monday and that's a good thing because this week I was starting to get a little too involved. Its hard, my ego loves how much everyone likes me there. If I'm its not totally reciprocal. I mean, there are some cool co-workers, but no one I'm going to ever actually be real friends with. I mean, never say never. But you know. I've been training all week and busy and actually working and I've realized, isht, I'm here, this is real. It's starting to sink in and things are changing. And damn, I sure am broke for someone who just sold out. But it takes forever to get added to payroll and get my first checks and I miss getting paid weekly from temping, even if it was smaller amounts.
Today I did a project for this Intimidatingly Femme Redhead attorney which was this small task and when I stopped by her office to ask a question, I was overwhelmed by her perfume which triggered this intense memory of a teacher I was completely in love with my senior year of high school. They look and sound and act nothing a lot. It's strange to suddenly look at someone and have unintentional feelings towards them purely on the cached memory in my brain of a former lust/love.
Ok, look I should just say it outloud, I've been all weird lately and depressed isn't the right word but it's the first word that comes to mind. A better word is misaligned, but people don't really know what that means so I don't say it. I'm getting synced up some though. Or maybe I'm just a little bummed out and scared and that's all part of the mix.
Oh, and apparently I have a letter to the editor published in this week's Reader. The same day I got notified of a story rejection (from a different publication). C'mon now. You'll take my rants about movie critics but not my fiction?! People, this is not helping.
So yeah, office drama. Soon I will not really be privy to such things as my hours switch to nights on Monday and that's a good thing because this week I was starting to get a little too involved. Its hard, my ego loves how much everyone likes me there. If I'm its not totally reciprocal. I mean, there are some cool co-workers, but no one I'm going to ever actually be real friends with. I mean, never say never. But you know. I've been training all week and busy and actually working and I've realized, isht, I'm here, this is real. It's starting to sink in and things are changing. And damn, I sure am broke for someone who just sold out. But it takes forever to get added to payroll and get my first checks and I miss getting paid weekly from temping, even if it was smaller amounts.
Today I did a project for this Intimidatingly Femme Redhead attorney which was this small task and when I stopped by her office to ask a question, I was overwhelmed by her perfume which triggered this intense memory of a teacher I was completely in love with my senior year of high school. They look and sound and act nothing a lot. It's strange to suddenly look at someone and have unintentional feelings towards them purely on the cached memory in my brain of a former lust/love.
Ok, look I should just say it outloud, I've been all weird lately and depressed isn't the right word but it's the first word that comes to mind. A better word is misaligned, but people don't really know what that means so I don't say it. I'm getting synced up some though. Or maybe I'm just a little bummed out and scared and that's all part of the mix.
Oh, and apparently I have a letter to the editor published in this week's Reader. The same day I got notified of a story rejection (from a different publication). C'mon now. You'll take my rants about movie critics but not my fiction?! People, this is not helping.
