I couldn't walk and I tried to run

Guess who, in the excitement of a bright sunny day and the opportunity to wear my prescription sunglasses while running errands before work, left his regular glasses sitting on the kitchen table? I think all night I will be employing the strategy of Act Like Nothing is Wrong while sitting at my cubicle wearing blue aviators. Then keep a tally of who actually says something.

It has been a heavy day, a double-dose SAMe day, and strangely, this accidental dumbassery, rather than making me feel worse, makes me feel a bit better. Its hard to take things in life too seriously in the midst of such ridiculous mistakes, I can't maintain a littly black stormcloud over my head when I look like the kid in my userpic. Also, there is the part of me that likes wearing my sunglasses indoors, even at night, but I tend to do that at places like karaoke bars, not my job.

This is also the first day in awhile for me where I've had significant alone time. The holidays bring lots of people to town that I'm excited to see, like having Elevensies with limenal yesterday, which is all great, until after several days in a row of contact with people and I'm like, why am I so cranky? Oh yeah.

After a phone conversation with drinkasyoupour last night, this morning I looked into a specific writer's residency for later in the year, one near Chicago, and the application is due in less than 2 weeks. And my instinct was to hurry up and e-mail my references to write me a letter, which I did, but this is also good, because at another time my instinct would have been to say, oh never mind, I'll do it next time. Writing feels thick to me these days, I'm out of the habit, and today I opened up my manuscript for the first time since before xmas and squeezed out a page, but mostly I feel sort of unsure and sticky about where its going, about gathering up the forces to make it happen if I don't know where to direct them. I've also had two stories rejected by publications in the past two weeks. And while I don't feel particularly emotionally rejected, I just feel sort of bothered by now needing to resubmit them elsewhere. Waiting for responses from editors doesn't bother me nearly as much as researching new places to send them, I've learned of myself. One day at a time, one page at a time and all that.

Today I won free tickets to a show at Schuba's tomorrow -- Pixies tribute night with Bobby Bare Jr. -- and I get to hang out with vfc who's my plus-one. Maybe I'll wear my sunglasses all night tomorrow too.