raybear | (no subject) (Reply)

I do not know what day it is, though its early August and there are workers on a roof outside my kitchen window, so that must mean its a sunny day. They are not exactly bothering me, I've awoken before they've arrived these past two mornings, and the noise is there, but not excessively more than any sunny weekend day with lawn mowers and radios laughter, it is just somewhat amusing the chaos around me, two days ago my downstairs neighbors left quickly and quietly, over the course of one day, and if I hadn't had run into them in the laundry room, I wouldn't have known they were moving to Brooklyn (Williamsburg, I imagine), also they left their fcking hipster schwinn bikes in the basment, along with their typewriter collection, so I availed myself of one that is nicely working, just needs a new rubber cylinder thing, and contemplating selling the red granny bike for $25 on craigslist. And now the next-door neighbor is replacing the caved raccoon-filled roof, so this is a good thing (some day I will upload the video of raccoons out my kitchen window), I do not begrudge the gentlemen working and we have a tacit agreement that they will no acknowledge that they are two feet from my kitchen and we can see each other, and I will continue to wander around in only boxers to ensure it. Oh yeah, its Sunday. I have to cut my hair and get dressed soon, I have door duty at zen temple today, which means I'm breaking my "don't interact with strangers" rule I've been keeping this week (unless it is a utilitarian interaction, like librarians or cashiers or postal workers, etc.). It has been nice to be alone, I have been making use of the time partly by rearranging furniture and cleaning things out. Tomorrow morning I go to IKEA, but I know exactly what I want, how much it costs, etc., so it should be a more pleasurable trip I think, than the ones that tend to lead to meltdown because it is too much choice. The cat is apparently more alarmed by the roofers than I, her ears are permanently on high alert. Last night something unexpected happen (though I had premonitions of it beforehand, but it is still how it felt), in a good way, and on the bus ride home afterwards I thought about how the universe has lately handed me a lot of heartbreak this year, more than I would have thought capable of handling back to back to back to back, but sometimes that doesn't matter. Maybe I am a spiritual masochist, but I feel like now I enjoy the moments of pleasure ten times more than I used to, and pain is worth it. Well, at least until the euphoria wears off. Now I'm back to about 50-50.