raybear | Who's your housekeeper, whatchu keep in your house?

I forgot my new line from the weekend:

"Are there any USAers in the house tonight? any USAers?"

It's funnier when said aloud. Also funnier when I say it, of course. As

stuey said "I crack my shit up." And we do. Yes, we do.

Sometimes I have great sex and I don't appreciate it and then I feel guilty for not appreciating it. And by appreciating, I mean, there are people starving in the former Yugoslavia, so I should be thrilled on behalf of folks who aren't and why am I acting so blase about it? This makes no sense.

And by the way, no. No livejournalers were in my previously mentioned dream attempt at lesbian orgy, with the exception of my Special Lady Friend. It's actually a rare occasion that MelRo shows up in sex dreams. I don't have many sex dreams though. But the attempted orgy did include a brief break from the action when I had to explain to the lesbians about my "trans thing". And I recall it went remarkably well. Hmm. I seem to recall my saying something to the effect of "look, just fck me like you would a butch, but call me 'ray' and 'he'." And they all nodded in agreement like they knew exactly what was going on.

A Person recently remarked that she looks forward to the day when she can say "What's HER problem?" regarding me (in a gay way, obviously) and it's not remotely problematic. Me too. I can't wait to be a 'Mary' and a 'girl' in a fairy fag way and the double entendre is funny and not weird or awkward or possibly inducing a downward spiral into feelings of hatred and doom about my body and identity. Ok, maybe it's not that bad. But maybe it is and I'm just ignoring myself. Maybe I'm not in touch with my own oppression. Or maybe, like my family, it's too big for me to even deal with it, so I ignore it. But if you ignore your teeth, they'll go away.

I promise I have not been sippin' on sizzurp today. I've watched plenty ot Waltussin get consumed recently, but not by me. I can't readily explain my weird mood and how my mind is working right now. Other than things are extremely non-linear. And fun. Goddamn, things are fun right now. Even the fcked up shit. Why is that?

In unrelated news, I've been wanting chest surgery very very very badly lately.

In earth news, my work review is being postponed until the first week of February when a decision will be made on raises and if the freeze will end. I received a tip from devo at a party that we've had an "extremely good december", so perhaps all will be fine.

In other work news, the part of Mr. Mister is now being played by Former Office Founder who doesn't get a more clever nickname because I don't have a read on her personality yet. Though she seems very nice and capable and chill. Those sound like boring adjectives, yet so rare in managers these days.

My Presto Multi-cooker did not arrive on schedule today. But my game of Encore did. As did my copy of Best in Show. I think I know what I'll be doing tonight.