baby mama non-drama
Feb. 19th, 2002 12:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
raybearThis may scare some people who read my journal (though probably not ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kisha and others, who've written about this before, including today), but for some reason in the past week or so I've been thinking more about having a kid. And being a parent. And being a father specifically. Not that I have specific parenting tasks which are gendered, but more that society does, so I like the idea of being a dad who's just a great parent and doesn't follow the expectations. In other words, the opposite of my own dad.
At Walgreens on Sunday, I noticed I was buying cornstarch baby powder and baby wipes (along with various other toiletries, kitchen supplies and marked-down valentine candy). And neither purchase had anything to with a child. But the clerk might think so. Then I started to wonder how people would think of me as a parent, and I think I'd be a pretty good one.
It probably doesn't help that MelRo has friends who just had a baby, and I had a friend who had one last year, and I have friends getting married this year (with some talk of future family planning). They just feed the seeds. No pun intended.
I don't know for sure that my future family includes raising a kid. But I feel pretty sure it does. And weirdly enough, I sometimes envy the ability to have things happen 'on accident', because I have excellent coping skills (i.e. coping with learning that I'm about to be a parent), plus I'm old enough and more mature and steady, and most importantly, nearly ready. And it's also hella cheaper to have a kid that way -- adoption expenses are high. Though perhaps if you add up the doctor's prenatal care and birth costs, it might end up being comparable. I haven't done tons of research since I'm not actively planning anything outside of my head or in the near future.
Maybe it's also in my head because my boss is the family law expert of the organization. So everyday I'm reading all about these cases and laws involving kids. And I've mentioned before how impressionable I am. If I worked for real estate attorneys, this entry would be about planning to buy a house.
kisha and others, who've written about this before, including today), but for some reason in the past week or so I've been thinking more about having a kid. And being a parent. And being a father specifically. Not that I have specific parenting tasks which are gendered, but more that society does, so I like the idea of being a dad who's just a great parent and doesn't follow the expectations. In other words, the opposite of my own dad.At Walgreens on Sunday, I noticed I was buying cornstarch baby powder and baby wipes (along with various other toiletries, kitchen supplies and marked-down valentine candy). And neither purchase had anything to with a child. But the clerk might think so. Then I started to wonder how people would think of me as a parent, and I think I'd be a pretty good one.
It probably doesn't help that MelRo has friends who just had a baby, and I had a friend who had one last year, and I have friends getting married this year (with some talk of future family planning). They just feed the seeds. No pun intended.
I don't know for sure that my future family includes raising a kid. But I feel pretty sure it does. And weirdly enough, I sometimes envy the ability to have things happen 'on accident', because I have excellent coping skills (i.e. coping with learning that I'm about to be a parent), plus I'm old enough and more mature and steady, and most importantly, nearly ready. And it's also hella cheaper to have a kid that way -- adoption expenses are high. Though perhaps if you add up the doctor's prenatal care and birth costs, it might end up being comparable. I haven't done tons of research since I'm not actively planning anything outside of my head or in the near future.
Maybe it's also in my head because my boss is the family law expert of the organization. So everyday I'm reading all about these cases and laws involving kids. And I've mentioned before how impressionable I am. If I worked for real estate attorneys, this entry would be about planning to buy a house.
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will you be my baby daddy?
Date: 2002-02-19 11:55 am (UTC)i understand what you're saying about being a father.
i've wanted that for so long.
to be a completely new kind of daddy! yay for trannydaddys and otherwise transgressive masculine identified parents
no subject
Date: 2002-02-19 02:24 pm (UTC)could i do play dates and PTA meetings. i think i could. i think i could do a good job, but i don't know.
no subject
Date: 2002-02-19 04:17 pm (UTC)there was a lot more talk about babies at tsc than i had expected, so that got me thinking, too. ri and i want babies... maybe in a few years.