If y'all don't hear me, y'all don't feel me.

A Guide to Raybear Lexicon

That's baywatch

Variations: "On some baywatch isht" or "baywatchness"
Origin: Ghostface Killah lyric on a Cappadonna song: All y'all [players] on some baywatch isht.
Meaning: Silly stupid or nonsensical. Acting in a bizarre way with no rational basis. Used often in the work context to describe the behavior of frantic co-workers or also as an adjective to a time period, if many events happened during the day.

And thanks....for playing. (Intonation plays a key role.)

Variations: Saying it in spanish or french. Sometimes emphasizing the word 'you', as in "Thank YOU for playing."
Origin: Karen from the television show Will & Grace. I said it for awhile and gave it to Damon, then he gave it back to me. I forgot I originated it.
Meaning: Similar to "thankyoudrivethrough" or "Game Over".
See also: "Where's that potsticker man?" or "Denied, denied....approooved!"
Historically related: "It's cute that you think that" which was taken from an episode of Murphy Brown more than ten years ago. I still say this too.

We all have our Nelly Furtados.

Variations: none.
Origin and Meaning: In a discussion with my friend Becky at a record store, I mentioned feeling lame for being interested in an artist, and she said last week she was in her friends car jamming to the music and asked who it was. It turned out to be Nelly Furtado, who had just ambushed us with constant radio play of her annoying single. Becky decided to buy her album anyway, despite her guilt and shame. She then reassured me by saying 'We all have our Nelly Furtados.'
Sidenote: I've never seen her video all the way through because I hated it so much. I would always change the channel of the radio or television and complain about her being a record company created artist. Last week I put a song of hers on a mixtape. That is so me.

You need a baby bib.

Variations: Baby bib. Bibster. Bibbery. Get thee to a bibbery. Two words: baby bib, or just 'Two words.'
Origin: Misheard Ghostface Killah lyric. He actually says "you did a baby bid", as in, you only did a small stint in jail. I thought he said "you need a baby bib," which still fit the context of the song.
Meaning: You need help. You fcked up bad in a completely preventable way. You think you're bigger than you are. (All of this is in a teasing way, not to be taken as the ultimate insult or anything.)
Historical context: Not too far off from the saying "too big for your britches", which my grandmother said to me and I still say.

If you want to be my number one, tell me your future plans.

I currently have 666 messages in my e-mail inbox. Me and the devil, baby. And I said hello Satan, I believe it's time to go.

But it's not a Robert Johnson day, it's a Horace Andy day. Well, it's just a reggae day but that's the only CD I have on tap at the office, so it's been repeated once or twice. I tried not to torture the nice intern behind me who may or may not be listening.

I did radio in college, interning with a rock show at 2 am on Thursday nights and a folk show on Sunday mornings. The producer was one of those childish adults, those people I seem to encounter a lot who haven't quite been able to cope with being a grown up. She agitated me a lot, and sometimes the DJ who's Continental Drift show followed us would listen patiently to my gripings. We had a small bond over being from Atlanta, even though she went to Lovejoy and I went to a school far away that maybe scared her for no apparent reason. But she would say, "now it's time to sit back and chill because that's what reggae music is about." And for the first time I actually listened to the music and learned a bit of history and artists and styles.

Six years later I'm not too much better off in surrounding myself with non-childish adults. Nor am I as educated about reggae as I'd like. I intend to fix both. Here's where I'll start.

( put THIS on your Amazon wish list )

What reggae do you recommend?