The Night I Kissed Larry Kramer

[raybear]

Or more accurately, the night Larry Kramer gave me the brush off. I didn't get the hug or handshake goodbye -- I got the pat on the arm! I was nearly irate. I was supposed to brush him off. Though as MelRo so lovingly pointed out, the reason he rejected me is because I gave him the tools to do it -- I just dropped the big bomb on him about being bi, being partnered, being trans. I'm sure his mind is still reeling. Oh, and there's no way he's 5'7" or even 57 yo. He seemed closer to to 5'5" and 64 yo. He was the love child of Larry Kramer and Peter Boyle, though maybe more two parts Larry. Which, you know, would have been great if he was actually Larry. But instead it was just awkward in that way when your Dad's friend gives you a ride home and you like him well enough but it's a supreme effort to sustain a conversation. I found myself mumbling a lot -- that's a bad sign. It means I'm nervous and insecure about what I'm saying and/or I'm not even really saying anything at all and I'm only making vowel noises with occasional consonants to fill the air while my brain constructs real sentences.

So anyway, I'll be shocked if he calls me. Which is fine. It's not like I'd rush to call him back. But I feel fine with the prospect of possibly running into him at future community events and being cordial.



Larry Kramer:



.....though Marc didn't smile this much. He seemed to wince more, which is why reminded me of.....

Peter Boyle:

Comments

[the-passives.livejournal.com]

oh hell no. you can do SO much better than that!

[myloveisrobotic.livejournal.com]

......fuck

you should still obliterate him with an orbital l-a-s-e-r.

[kisha.livejournal.com]

Oh dear God.
Is Peter Boyle the father on "Everybody Loves Raymond"? Sorta looks like him.

[raybear.livejournal.com]

Yes, he is! I actually love Peter Boyle as an actor. I just wouldn't want to date his personality-lacking twin brother. Which is what I did last night.

[sean7232.livejournal.com]

although we have a weird sometimes i read and respond quasi-relationship (or not), i want to bust out of my pants and say that I'm greatly enjoying reading your ad response saga...i desperately tried to find a pic of Richard off his site, but maybe i couldn't cause he's not selling his body, he's selling art...anyway, I'm guessing that you conveniently omitted the bi, trans, partnered thing in your ad? I'm hoping to find a Daddy too, but only as a part time (cringe at the thought of what real scene people would think of my characterization of Daddy need as a hobby) So I hear you are the fashion-dude, so does that mean you do consulting?
peac

[raybear.livejournal.com]

whaddup doc!!?!??

thanks for your interest in my personal ad adventures. this is the first ad i've placed where i don't out myself as trans -- last time i did i got no response or i got it from guys looking for MTF's. this is also the first time i put it in "men seeking men" instead of "none of the above". i decided to meet people first and let them see me as a guy before coming out -- plus, i don't necessarily need to come out to people i won't be pursuing. and it's sort of an adventure to be out on a date as "just a gay guy" or whatever.

i wish there was a photo of Richard on the site! i was hoping for one too, even just a headshot or something.

i occasionally do some fashion consulting -- tell me the occasion and the options and i'll do my best with a recommendation!

take care,
ray

Re:

[sean7232.livejournal.com]

that makes sense to me...I'm inspired by your success, lol...the adventure aspect is great if only i wasn't so anxiety prone...having my long-term partner waiting at home for me would probably help with that, though...we're slowly paving the way towards a polydeal...so are you front about having a girlfriend? am i even correct in that assessment or am i projecting my own situation onto you? are you serious about consulting? is my lowercase streaming pissing you off yet?

the occasion is day to day and options are few...im in desparate need of a style now that i can actually take my normal sized body to a store and buy something...there's alot more variation at 34 than there was at 48 :-)
peace
feel free to take this to e-mail so i don't fill up your personal space sean7232@yahoo.com

[raybear.livejournal.com]

no you're right, i do have a long-term girlfriend, and she's handling it quite well i think. our sort of new thing is that i talk to her about things, but more in the same way i'd go to my best friend and spill all the details in a gossipy fun way, rather than treating it like this big scary thing that i must reveal. i think she's a little bit more okay with me dating guys, and besides if for some reason i later come out as gay, it's probably bound to happen eventually so maybe better now than 5 years down the road when we have a house and kid.

oh, and yes, having someone waiting at home to curl up in bed and hug you is most helpful -- dating can be brutal on the ego and self-esteem, even when it's going well!

whoa, you went from 48 to 34!?!?? damn. i went from 44 to 37. yeah, 37. I buy 38 pants and they're usually a little big but that's better than the 36's being too tight. I'd like to drop another inch or so, but i'm not obsessing about it.

the key to my wardrobe is that most everything matches. i've only recently made additions to my wardrobe that only go with a select other garments. for example, almost all of my pants are khaki pants, jeans, or gray pants. i have lots of gray and black shirts. i think v-neck sweaters and shirts are good, but make sure the v doesn't go to low -- not past your collar bone. don't be afraid to buy clothes that actually fit and possibly even cling a little -- i think it looks much neater to have a form fitting shirt that shows off a belly a little rather than a baggy sloppy shirt.

stick with solid pants initially. no patterns or even tweed types either. don't buy jeans too overrinsed, and if you prefer buying the dark rinse deep blue jeans, realize that you aren't buying jeans -- you're buying blue pants, so you can't get away with quite as much. black and gray don't always work with dark blue jeans -- it's too much like mixing navy and black which CAN be done, but leave it to the professionals.

button up shirts are a good way to look sharp, either alone or under said v-neck sweater. sweater vests are excellent in making chests look smoother and they lengthen your torso if your short-waisted (which i am). I prefer wearing dress pants, dress shirt and tie with a sweater vest instead of a coat, but it still looks sharp. (solid color ties or small patterns are good.)

always match your belt and shoes. and please don't wear white socks with dark shoes. white socks should only be worn with sneakers. i like thick cotton black socks, which feel like athletic socks and last longer (instead of those thin trouser socks).

brown shoes are iffy. i genreally stay away from them because they're often hard to pull off. i have one pair that sits and collects dust. instead i prefer yellow shoes -- the timberland macaroni boot color. dark red might work too.

don't be afraid to mix brown and black. a maroon shirt with dark brown pants looks better with a black belt and black shoes. trust me. brown shoes are pretty hard to pull off, except for maybe with jeans when being really casual and even then....it's for advanced fashionistas frankly. stick with black shoes for the most part.
white undershirts are good too -- i wear them under almost everything. the white collar makes every shirt looks crisper and neater.

so was this too basic? do you need more specifics? brands? i'm mostly an old navy man, sometimes gap. i also like van heusen, actually, and sometimes structure and polo, but only if i find them at thrift stores.

thrift store shoppping is an excellent way to try different style and sizes without having to spend tons of money. also, i recommend having one pair of good expensive shoes that don't hurt your feet (preferably black!) and buying the rest at payless -- another good way to get something stylish and trendy and trying out before spending hundreds of dollar on something that will look lame next year.

good luck!!

raybear, the self-appointed wannabe fashion guru