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raybear ([personal profile] raybear) wrote2003-03-13 11:16 am

Further Tales of Raybear Lexicon

This might be a little long, because I might launch into random anecdotes and back stories. I will try to make them interesting.

So here come explanations of the subject lines from yesterday.

Is that Basquiat on the 1's and 2's?

Referencing the video for Blondie's Rapture, where Jean-Michel Basquiat plays the DJ. "1's and 2's" is slang for turntables.

This is Barbie. She represents the women's movement.

One of my favorite SNL Weekend Update skits involved Cheri Oteri doing a timeline of the women's movement. She used a Barbie doll to show where things were. "Amelia Earhart, a few steps forward...Marilyn Monroe was a ditz, but at least she had curves...ooops, there's Twiggy! Anoriexia sends up back five steps!" At the end of the sketch, Cheri turns to Colin and says, "so why didn't you call me, Colin?" He mumbles, then she mimics him in a whiney voice. He starts cracking up, and she says, "just call me, Colin. Just call me." We say this a lot too.

Landlordesses, attack now!

Mad TV's best skits in the history of the world is Glamazon Huntressess 3000 B.C. (Vance, please correct me if I got the date wrong.) When Damon moved into his new apartment, he was this single bachelor living above this house owned by a lesbian couple and their dog. Super fabulous people who he gets along with fabulously, and we started calling them "the landlordessess".

George Washington: Swamp Thing 2

The main character in this movie reminds me of the kid in the movie Swamp Thing.

The S.S. Minnow! No points this round.

From the movie Scrooged -- at the end when Bill Murray reveals to his brother that he overheard their game of Trivia Pursuit. It sounds better when said aloud

Sure, Marge. "Talk."

An interpolation of Lionel Hutz from the episode of The Simpsons when Marge becomes a real-estate agent. She wants to tell the truth, and Lionel says "there's 'the truth' [shakes head and furrows brow]...and then 'the truth!' [he exclaims with a bright fake smile]." Later he goes, "sure, Marge, 'is'", and makes air quotes. Again, this all sounds better in person.

Tonight on a very special A-Team.

Whatever happened to television using this phrase? It's so 80's. Tonight, on a ver special Blossom....

Blow like Penelope Cruz

Penelope Cruz was in the movie called "Blow". I know this one is probably self-explanatory, but it's my new favorite. I'm going to say it all the time.

But it'll hurt if I swallow.

This originated in a Chloroseptic commercial with some little girl saying over and over again in this internal monologue. Then Ludacris said it on his second album -- "it'll hurt if i swallow, but hurt worse if I choke." This got him promosted to the shit.

Beyonce fans on Friday were Kelis fans on Saturday.

On an MTV news special about the Nas/Jay-Z beef, they talked about all of New York waiting to hear Ether for the first time on Hot 97 on Friday evening. He is response to The Takeover was ruthless and tight. A NYC DJ described it as "people who were Jay-Z fans on Friday, were Nas fans on Saturday." I loved that fcking line. Damon flipped it to make a joke about second-tier R&B singers.

I'll kill you like the Prince of Tides

There's a line in the movie where Nick Nolte's daughter says in a thick Carolina accent, "Daddy if you miss my birthday, I'm gonna kill you!" Again, sounds better in person.

Revenge of the Sexual Harrassment Panda

From an episode of South Park

Missy, Missy, Missy wrote this song.

While playing scrabble with my favorite lesbian couple, we were listening to Whitney's last (good) album from a few years ago. One said, I think this is the song that Missy did for her? and the other said, yeah, you can tell because she goes "Missy....Missy....Missy wrote this song." I love my girl, but it's so true. How many times on Under Construction does she say "this is a Missy Elliot exclusive"?

Is that roof high enough...or does it need to be raised?!

this comes from Blackpeopleloveus.com

KRS already made an album called Joyride

Nas dissed Jay-Z by saying "KRS already made an album called Blueprint." We added Roxette to the mix for fun.



And......scene.

The Beyonce/Kelis rivalry

[identity profile] limenal.livejournal.com 2003-03-13 10:06 am (UTC)(link)
When I saw this on the list yesterday, I about died. I'd never heard either of you guys say it, but I recognized the line from the Jay-Z/Nas report, and it's so much funnier this way...it's Kelis that does it.

Re: The Beyonce/Kelis rivalry

[identity profile] raybear.livejournal.com 2003-03-13 11:14 am (UTC)(link)
While I'm the one who repeated the line from the MTV special a lot, I must give props to Damon -- he came up with this one. I laughed out loud the first time I saw it and I still do.

(Fun fact: The added level is that Beyonce is/was romantically linked to Jay-Z and Kelis is/was linked to Nas.)

[identity profile] kisha.livejournal.com 2003-03-13 10:07 am (UTC)(link)
Oh snap, I didn't know Basquiat was in that Blondie video!!
I know Fab Five Freddie was though. That's cool.

Re: "Very Special" Tee Vee...

[identity profile] penpusher.livejournal.com 2003-03-13 12:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Of course, the Jump The Shark Website has made the "Very Special" episode a "jumping point" for any series willing to try it, which is why the phrase doesn't get used much anymore.

However, the intrepid creators of MTV's animated series, "Clone High" have no fear! Tune in Mondays at 10:30 (and at other times during the week). It's one of the funniest shows on right now and every ep is a Very Special one.

Clone High

[identity profile] raybear.livejournal.com 2003-03-13 12:26 pm (UTC)(link)
agreed -- I love that show!

po-mo boy

[identity profile] sean7232.livejournal.com 2003-03-15 09:18 am (UTC)(link)
if i could only recall any of the popular culture absorption i took part in...i can't wait to engage in lowbrow (and that doesn't mean i affirm the leisure hierarchy) rituals with you cause you will be my memory

I'm plaid, your stripes. Together we be clashin'.

(Anonymous) 2003-03-16 04:13 pm (UTC)(link)
This is Damon aka Nomad aka Raymond's brother from another mother. This shit is totally bringing back memories from like two years ago! Here are a few more (Ray, you can break these down or I can come back for another guest appearance):

*GAMF? You need to go to the LAMF.
*What about Destiny's Child? Is that hip-hop?
*Do you mean Big Analogy? Is he funny?
*These bottoms are tops!
*It's a freakin' hammer!
*Keep it raw and uncut for all the umms and umms
*Eat the drugs! Stay away from school! Do milk!
*Koko attack!
*Oh, Goonies?
*Play it to da bone!

Re: I'm plaid, your stripes. Together we be clashin'.

[identity profile] raybear.livejournal.com 2003-03-17 08:04 am (UTC)(link)
HAHAHA!

Take your mittens off, it's a hot one.