raybear | You held it in for so long, you bursted into tears

From a daily buddhist online meditation:

How lucky I am to be alive this morning, that death did not occur last night. How lucky I am to have my perfect human body; ... how lucky I am to have met the Buddhadharma; I should not waste my life.

I've gotten large amounts of work done this morning, comparatively speaking. Deadlines are a good thing, assuming they're reasonable. I appreciate the rush that comes with it. I'm on page 9 out of 21 and I have until about 4 pm or so. Another half hour of work or so, then I'll take a lunch break and check out

dommeyourass's court case.

I think tonight after work I'm going for a run. Maybe if I say it here I'll feel more obligated to make it happen. I might have to quit smoking for a few days to help my body adjust, but I'll see how hard of a time my lungs have. Maybe I can just get away with cutting back down to more reasonable levels (one pack a week instead of three packs a week).

Or maybe I'll meditate instead. I just feel the need to do something physical. I wish I had a pool I could swim in. I hate that I can't just go swimming anymore (despite "my perfect human body").

I should not waste my life.