raybear | Though my heart was tossed with longing.

For those in the Chicago area, sorry if last night's thunderstorm caused you any problems -- that was partially my fault, though I assure you it was an unintentional summoning. I didn't even know it's what I was doing, but as soon as it appeared it made sense.

Last night I had this moment, a holy moment if you will, to borrow a phrase from Waking Life which nearly got ruined because I stepped outside of myself and thought "wow, I'm having a moment!" This was quickly followed by a brief moment of sadness because I knew the moment would end, unfortunately quite common -- not only the feeling of sadness but the ruination of the moment by acknowledging it. But I stopped myself and said, you're having this. It's real. You have this and people have gone an entire lifetime without this, which means I'm a lucky bastard. Even more phenomenal is that I realized how completely natural and innate it was for me to create and come to this moment with virtually no effort, so that if I were to be separated by thousands of miles for thousands of hours, I could still find it again if I just trust myself to do it on it's own.

A strange and beautiful moment of temporal enlightenment. But that's okay. More enlightenment TK, I felt like the universe was telling me.

Is there a word for experiencing something for the first time but knowing exactly what it is and how to respond or just absorb?