raybear | When you have insomnia, you're never really asleep... and you're never really awake.

If you wake up at a different time in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?

There was some bedroom disconnection last night, but I felt satisfied that a cigarette and a few minutes of television would temporarily solve it until the morning. And it did initially -- I crawled back into bed around midnight and snuggled up, drifting aimlessly in a strange world of part-lucid dreaming, part-sleep paralysis, part-nearing the cliff dropoff into a long night of REM sleep.

12:45 a.m. : Sophie hops off the bed and pukes on the floor. I wake up and start to roll back over, thinking that cleaning it up in the morning sounds like the best idea ever. She pukes again. I remember that numerous clothes are strewn on the floor, so I get up. She was kind enough to yak on a clear spot of the floor. However, she was embarassed and ashamed of her illness, because when I left for 20 seconds to get paper towels, she attempted to bury her mess with my sock. I threw the sock away and wiped up the mess. I knew she was puking because of the worming medication I gave her earlier in the evening -- I gave her an ice cube to make her feel better and crawled back into bed.

1:20 a.m. : I realize I'm extremely awake and haven't fallen asleep in the half hour since I got back into bed. I try some deep breathing to relax back into sleep. I recite my Insomnia Motto: Don't get up and do anything -- it will only make you more awake.

1:30 a.m. : I consider calling friends on the west coast who would still be awake and it's not that unreasonable of an hour. I feel too sleepy to get up, so I change positions and go back to deep breathing.

1:34 a.m. : I consider watching a movie. I recite my motto and stay in bed.

1:47 a.m. : I start to envy

dommeyourass in her sleeping state. I consider waking her up and making her suffer with me/entertain me with stories. I veto this idea because a) there's no need to bring her down with me; b) she probably wouldn't wake up anyway; and c) the motto.

1:55 a.m. : I consider calling

cocolola to have her tell me knock-knock jokes. I veto this because a) I'd like her to remain my friend; and b) I don't have her phone number.

1:56 a.m. : I realize I've given up on the motto. I think about getting my laundry out of the dryer, but feel cozy in bed.

2:03 a.m. : I start to feel bitter towards the cozyness and it not helping me sleep. I wonder if I'll go crazy if I stay up all night.

2:07 a.m. : I realize I must do something active to wear myself out and bring on sleep. I get up and take allergy medicine that will make me sleepy. I go back to bed. I realize that probably wasn't active enough.

2:18 a.m. : I decide I must leave the house. I will for go a walk. I will go for a run. I don't want to get dressed.

2:22 a.m. : The solution comes to me: Walgreens.

2:25 a.m. : I put on enough clothes to leave the house legally. I immediately run into a drunken couple who get in my face asking if I know a bar nearby that's still open. They appear to be with a teenage boy. I shrug and cross against the light.

2:33 a.m. : Once inside Walgreens, my plan to do a long shopping trip, including lots of road supplies, seems too daunting. I can't focus amidst the florescent lights and want to be in bed. I pick up a package of oreo cookies and wander to the register.

2:36 a.m. : I smoke the last cigarette on the way home, aka the lucky cigarette. I decide if it's truly lucky, I'll fall asleep.

3:00 a.m. : I'm home, undressed, and have a glass of milk along with the cookies and plant myself in front of the television. I begin consumption.

3:04 a.m. : Gluttony ends. Number of cookies consumed is unknown, though it's definitely more than seven.

3:06 a.m. : I decide to watch porn.

3:20 a.m. : Orgasm, sugar crash, and allergy medication collide into highly anticipated merging of exhaustion.

3:25 a.m. : I'm back in bed drifting off.

7:05 a.m. : Alarm goes off and I groan loudly in pain.

That pretty much brings us current.

Last night I made dinner for

nineinchlovely,

lakenaiad, and

limenal. It tasted good, like a triangle. Tonight I'm making

lakenaiad come over to help me pack while I give her more detailed Sophie-care instructions (I'm planning on writing them out at work today!), then I'm heading over to

dommeyourass's apartment as soon as I'm able, to sleep until she comes home, then sleep some more until we leave for DC at 6 am on Friday.

In the meantime, I'm answering phones at work because the phone answerer is out "sick".