I am the DJ, I am what I play.

[raybear]

What I'm about to write is not false modesty, nor is it an attempt to denigrate myself for the sake of receiving compliments or reassurances.

I am not the music geek/guru/expert that people think I am. Frankly, I don't even know how people come to this conclusion since I don't think I try to portray myself as one. I'm certainly open about being obsessed with music and loving it and constantly wanting to learn more about it, but I don't think I'm nearly as geeky about it as I could be, or even as I want to be.

I may be a DJ, but I can't beatmatch to save my life. Luckily (or because of this fact?), I don't really like how beatmatching sounds -- songs get shortened even more so, phrases get repeatedly excessively for the sake of a transition, limitations get placed on what can be put together if you're willing to have sounds crash into each other. But that doesn't mean I don't wish I could do it. I just haven't invested much time in learning.

I can barely scratch. I can do a couple different types of scratching, but that's only three out of dozens. I occasionally have good instincts about where scratches should go in a song, but I can't in anyway "cut the record up" in an enjoyable fashion. Much less do anything behind the back or whatnot.

I struggle with music theory. I did okay when I was taking piano lessons back in the day, but I seem to have plateaued since the age of ten. I have hope for learning more, but to be real, it's going to take a lot of time because I barely get minor chords, much less sevenths and ninths and whatnot.

Despite taking nearly a decade of piano lesson, I'm quite ignorant about most forms of classical music. I'm still sort of in the "I know what I like" category of learning, but even that's not true because there are many things I like but have NO idea who the composer is or what period or anything. I'm totally the mofo who's like "do you have the CD with the song playing the beef commerical?" or "do you have the song they play during the montage at the end of Wimbledon coverage?"

Another major category of music I'm lacking is rock. Seriously. I don't own every Beatles album. I hate most of Led Zeppelin. I think I have a best-of Doors album. Other "seminal" groups (at least by VH1 standards) I know a little bit about it and even like but have few albums or real understanding of why they're important: Velvet Underground, The Rolling Stones, Bruce Springsteen, Jimi Hendrix, The Who, Sex Pistols, and many many more. Don't even get me started on my ignorance towards indie rock and it's various incarnations like punk and emo and garage and whatnot.

Even in the genre I probably know best, hip-hop, I would still say I'm always a student. Part of why I love Ego Trip's Big Book of Rap Lists is because when I first bought it, I could open the book to any page and any list, and I would maybe only know one song or artist or album for each ten they named. (Now I can open the books and will maybe know at least two or three!) It made me realize how big the catalog is and how much I had either forgotten or never knew.

I guess my point is, it's all relative. I don't feel like I'm geeky enough and will continue to absorb music voraciously. Or so I hope. I had this theory as a teenager that people turn 30 and start buying one CD a year versus one per week (which I was averaging for awhile) -- my brother became this way, and I became a music junkie because of him. Luckily as I've grown up and actually, you know, met more people over 30, this hasn't been proven true. But even if people only own 15 albums to my 1500, I still have often found they'll have something I don't or will have a passion for an artist or genre that I know nothing about.

And even if you don't, that doesn't mean I won't still think you're cool.

Comments

[julitabonita.livejournal.com]

dude. yes. this is so how I feel about music a lot of the time. I'm always learning, and there's always more to learn. Except you are a DJ, and I've always wanted to be a DJ, so there's that. Anyways, it's cool because those are definitely thoughts and feelings that have crossed my mind before.