I'm only here for this moment.

[raybear]

I've completed more tasks this morning than I'm often known to complete in an entire workday. What is this thing, productivity?

I've had some minor physical ailments in the past few days, mostly in the form of allergy attacks (including the somewhat embarassing experience of having my sneezes echo through the Ravinia pavillion on Saturday evening) but also some intestinal distress which may or may not be due to eating bad capers. Can capers go bad? I mean, I guess everything rots eventually. Who knew little flower buds could be so evil.

Occasionally I think about fasting and sometimes I even do it. It might even start unintentionally, like I realize it's been 16 hours since I ate so I decide to go another 12 more while drinking diluted fruit juice or whatever. I could do this today, except I've had coffee which isn't exactly a good fasting type beverage. But aside from the four bites of ice cream I had this morning while waiting for water to boil, I haven't eaten since about 4 o'clock yesterday. No real reason other than not feeling hungry. And the whole sitting on the toilet with great frequency problem I mentioned earlier.

Other times I think instead of fasting, I'll have a period of celibacy. That idea usually lasts about one-eighth of a second. But what I maybe think of most often is a vow of silence. Not for anything monk-like or excessive, like years or even months. But maybe just one day. One whole day of not speaking and with limited communication through other means (i.e. I wouldn't spend all day on e-mail and livejournal and IM or writing post-it notes). Would this have a similar effect as a one-day juice fast? A quick way of cleaning out my mouth, or more accurately my mind. A test of will, a lesson in paying attention to my words, an exercise in what I take for granted.

I wonder if I could get this approved at work, as a religious activity. I think about that conversation a lot too.

Someday I'll do it.

Comments

[keetbabe.livejournal.com]

i often think about fasting or going days without talking to anyone. it's like somehow i could cleanse myself of whatever is ailing me by doing so... or i could prove how pious i am (which is related to how catholic i was raised).

i once started a fast -- i bought 5 lbs of lemons and special maple syrup and began my day with it. the fast was supposed to last 10 days. i made it 3 hours. all i could think of was that i wanted a tuna fish sandwich. my head ached. my body ached. I WANT A TUNA SANDWICH. i gave in. when my body yells, i gotta listen....

in ireland mrmturtle and i stayed at this buddhist retreat which also had a hostel. it overlooked the ocean and was absolutely breathtakingly beautiful. there were residents who were on retreat for anywhere from a year to 3 years during which time they didn't talk to or look at anyone. there's a part of me that wished i could have that kind of discipline and be that devoted to my spiritual life --so much so that i would give up my life. in reality, i don't know that i could do it. but thinking about it was interesting enough...

[raybear.livejournal.com]

i just got off the phone with dommeyourass who was yelling at me about not eating because of my low blood sugar issues and then claimed it was psychosomatic because i was trying to explain that fasting sometimes works for me (i.e. if i never start eating during the day) but my blood sugar crashesmore often when i have been eating regularly then there's a break. i initially tried to explain the phenomenon based on my small amounts of nutrition and health geek knowledge, but then i gave up and said "you know what? i don't know why sometimes I can go ten hours without eating and feel fine but other times i get a migraine and sluggish feelings and eventually start puking. i just do what my body tells me."

then i read your comment where you said: "when my body yells, i gotta listen...." so true. which is why i think i can only do spontaneous fasting -- if it try to plan it, my body would probably get angry with me.

metabolism and hunger is so weird and fascinating.

[mintwaster.livejournal.com]

I did a silent treat at my temple once. I think it was three days, but it seemed longer. We woke up at 5am to monk with a small gong. We mediatated, did yoga, had breakfast, more mediatation, prayer, lunch, more meditation. We weren't allowed to talk, think (we had a mantra we chanted), or eat meat. It was pretty cool. I think as soon as it was over, I talked nonstop for about 45 minutes. It really didn't have a calming effect on me.

Also, about 5 years ago, I did a 14 day cleansing. I had to drink a gallon of water with lime and salt at 6am every morning. I think the first two days were liquids only (but only one type all day), the next few days, I was allowed fruit. As much of it as I wanted, but only one kind that I had to stick to. Then a few days of raw foods. And then fish. So it was gradual. I think I had a big hunk of fried chicken the day after the cleansing. But it felt great. I also wasn’t working at the time, so I wasn’t expending a lot of energy. My mom, somehow, talked me into going to this one day lecture/fast. Why she didn’t come with me, I don’t know. But I had to wear all white and do tai chi and eat apples while some guy lectured on macrobiotics. So I’m in this ridiculous outfit and thinking, “well, at least I don’t know anyone here”. Actually, it was “well, at least there are no hot girls here”. I was the youngest person by about 35 years in the room. So we’re doing tai chi and I have no patience and I see that the whole thing is being videotaped. And then I recognized the cameraman and sound guy as members of my crew. There were about two hundred people at the conference. Guess who the camera crew found right away?