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raybear and dommeyourass a
Jan. 6th, 2006 05:58 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
raybearThe sun shone for more than 30 seconds today. I wasn't sure how long it would last, so when it streamed through the windows of the kitchen right before I started to take a shower, I stood there naked with my arms outstretched, like a plant desperate for the rays. I took a deep breath and immediately felt better.
The sun returned on the train ride into the city. Right before going underground I said, this is an auspicious sign of the day, and then we discussed how the word "auspicious" always sounds like a negative word, not a favorable one, how 'irrespective' is a word but irregardless is not. I thought of SAT analogy tests and opposites and then the doors opened and we were downtown.
We started in the wrong government building and took a secret tunnel next door to the another government building, and on the permanent sign of which direction in the hallway to take were the words "domestic partnership". But when we walked into the actual room with roped off waiting lines and clerks at counters, all of their signs advertised for marriage licenses. We stepped up anyway.
The older woman asked what we needed and when we answered, immediately passed us off to another younger clerk, a white guy with longish premature silver hair and a black silk shirt with black dragons. Hmmm, maybe gay. Maybe just a hippie.
We told him what we were here for. He looks at us. He's about to explain that domestic partnerships are for same-sex couples, but I pre-empt his shpiel.
"See, we are a same-sex couple, because I am still legally female. I'm transsexual." I then laid out all my paperwork, my birth certificate, my name change court order from 5 years ago, my driver's license, which I twice pointed out also says that I'm legally female.
This is probably the comment that made DYA aware of the decibal level of my voice. I was talking loudly and very clearly. In some ways, it's a defense mechanism, a way of exerting power in situations that have the potential of making me self-conscious or ashamed. My mantra is "it's uncommon, not abnormal." But sometimes in my attempts to normalize, I perhaps go to far.
He repeated the information back, in mixed up bits. I could tell he was confused at first, because he asked at least twice, "wait, so you were born female?" I'm guessing he thought I was going the other way, that I was a pre-transition MTF who was there with my dyke partner, wanting to get reigstered as a same-sex couple to validate our lesbian love. Then he got it figured out. DYA offered to take a marriage license instead, which was sort of a lie, since neither one of us necessarily want to be legally married, but hey, we can be test case poster children for the queer marriage movement in Chicago. The clerk laughed when she said, "but that might open up Pandora's box." And he answered, "yeah, literally! no pun intended." I didn't get it at first.
He went back to check with a supervisor. Then came back and verified. Yep, we can get this. As soon as I become legally male, we will come back and get it annulled and then we can get a marriage license. We said sure, why not. In the meantime, I need health insurance! He agreed that was a useful start, and then said in somewhat hushed tones, "to be honest, this place isn't ready to handle the other option yet."
Before he sent us to the cashier he looked and asked very earnestly and excitedly, "so when is your big time?!" I was confused to what he was asking. Then I realized he meant "my procedure" or the big change or whatever. I said, well, to be honest, I need health insurance to pay for part of it. He was confused because he knew insurance doesn't cover SRS, and I said, well yes, but I've already had some surgery but I need a hysterectomy which could be covered. Suddenly I think we were both a little embarassed at how much information came out of my mouth. So we all quickly walked over to the cashier, where we paid our $30 for a piece of paper that says we paid $30 for a piece of paper, and he said, "my name is Michael, in case you ever have any questions. And good luck!"
And that's how we ended up getting married today.
On the way home, I bought a lottery ticket. I was feeling lucky.
The sun returned on the train ride into the city. Right before going underground I said, this is an auspicious sign of the day, and then we discussed how the word "auspicious" always sounds like a negative word, not a favorable one, how 'irrespective' is a word but irregardless is not. I thought of SAT analogy tests and opposites and then the doors opened and we were downtown.
We started in the wrong government building and took a secret tunnel next door to the another government building, and on the permanent sign of which direction in the hallway to take were the words "domestic partnership". But when we walked into the actual room with roped off waiting lines and clerks at counters, all of their signs advertised for marriage licenses. We stepped up anyway.
The older woman asked what we needed and when we answered, immediately passed us off to another younger clerk, a white guy with longish premature silver hair and a black silk shirt with black dragons. Hmmm, maybe gay. Maybe just a hippie.
We told him what we were here for. He looks at us. He's about to explain that domestic partnerships are for same-sex couples, but I pre-empt his shpiel.
"See, we are a same-sex couple, because I am still legally female. I'm transsexual." I then laid out all my paperwork, my birth certificate, my name change court order from 5 years ago, my driver's license, which I twice pointed out also says that I'm legally female.
This is probably the comment that made DYA aware of the decibal level of my voice. I was talking loudly and very clearly. In some ways, it's a defense mechanism, a way of exerting power in situations that have the potential of making me self-conscious or ashamed. My mantra is "it's uncommon, not abnormal." But sometimes in my attempts to normalize, I perhaps go to far.
He repeated the information back, in mixed up bits. I could tell he was confused at first, because he asked at least twice, "wait, so you were born female?" I'm guessing he thought I was going the other way, that I was a pre-transition MTF who was there with my dyke partner, wanting to get reigstered as a same-sex couple to validate our lesbian love. Then he got it figured out. DYA offered to take a marriage license instead, which was sort of a lie, since neither one of us necessarily want to be legally married, but hey, we can be test case poster children for the queer marriage movement in Chicago. The clerk laughed when she said, "but that might open up Pandora's box." And he answered, "yeah, literally! no pun intended." I didn't get it at first.
He went back to check with a supervisor. Then came back and verified. Yep, we can get this. As soon as I become legally male, we will come back and get it annulled and then we can get a marriage license. We said sure, why not. In the meantime, I need health insurance! He agreed that was a useful start, and then said in somewhat hushed tones, "to be honest, this place isn't ready to handle the other option yet."
Before he sent us to the cashier he looked and asked very earnestly and excitedly, "so when is your big time?!" I was confused to what he was asking. Then I realized he meant "my procedure" or the big change or whatever. I said, well, to be honest, I need health insurance to pay for part of it. He was confused because he knew insurance doesn't cover SRS, and I said, well yes, but I've already had some surgery but I need a hysterectomy which could be covered. Suddenly I think we were both a little embarassed at how much information came out of my mouth. So we all quickly walked over to the cashier, where we paid our $30 for a piece of paper that says we paid $30 for a piece of paper, and he said, "my name is Michael, in case you ever have any questions. And good luck!"
And that's how we ended up getting married today.
On the way home, I bought a lottery ticket. I was feeling lucky.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
i'm glad we both wrote this up!
Date: 2006-01-07 12:22 am (UTC)i love you. hubby.
Re: i'm glad we both wrote this up!
Date: 2006-01-07 12:24 am (UTC)i love you too. wifey. wait, i think i should be the wifey and you be the hubby.
Re: i'm glad we both wrote this up!
Date: 2006-01-07 12:30 am (UTC)Re: i'm glad we both wrote this up!
Date: 2006-01-07 05:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 01:13 am (UTC)This made me beam.
no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 01:35 am (UTC)Hooray for health insurance and hot sex!
no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 01:46 am (UTC)Well done!
no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 02:26 am (UTC)CONGRATULATIONS!
Date: 2006-01-07 02:35 am (UTC)And I didn't realize you were still carrying around a uterus. If I'd never known your history, I would totally take you for a dude, so keep up the good work! (Since we're having awkward conversations about naughty bits today, apparently).
no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 06:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 06:55 am (UTC)Congrats!
no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 08:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 09:54 am (UTC)But what is the rule re marriage do you know? Does the state of IL accept tranny birth certs... i ask cause i am researching all this in order to get a fiance visa...
CONGRATULATIONS!!!
no subject
Date: 2006-01-08 09:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 01:00 pm (UTC)Much happiness, Much Love!!
no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 01:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-07 04:00 pm (UTC)congrats!
Date: 2006-01-07 06:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-08 03:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-08 03:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-08 09:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-09 08:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-09 06:20 pm (UTC)