raybear | How I abhor this place, its sweet and bitter taste has left me wretched

I got by just fine for a very long time without a calender. I rarely scheduled my life more than a week or two in advance and I could hold it all in my head while occasionally looking into e-mails to confirm exact dates and times. Now I've finally become someone who owns a calender, uses it, and nearly depends on it. Or rather, the people who want to see me depend on me looking at it so that I show up on time. I could probably take it or leave it, since I can be all hermitesque, if left to my own devices. I would bust out of the house occasionally, just not on any regular, scheduled basis. But it looks like for the next three weeks I will be out on an extremely regular, scheduled basis, and I get a little tired and overwhelmed thinking about it.

Then I'm going to L.A.

Speaking of my seedy second home, I had a phone meeting yesterday evening with my 'mentor' who was very reassuring and supportive and renegotiated a deadline for me after I talked out a chapter idea. Suddenly, it all seems very manageable. Looking forward (send a chapter in two weeks) is much easier than thinking about how far behind I was dragging (send the chapter that was due two weeks ago).

Somewhere in all this, I need to find work that pays me, starting in May.

I know I recently said I don't listen to much indie rock/pop, but today The Decemberists sound so good to me.