who invited the dominatrix to the fancy dinner?

[raybear]

wow -- 2 birthdays on the same day with almost the same name. happy birthday to Clockwatcher, aka Jessie with an "i", the true spelling. and happy birthday to Jesseboi, aka Jesse with no "i", the true spelling. What you thought I would actually play favorites? You gotta hustle smarter than that.

I can't believe I made it to Friday. the longest week of my life. i think i've had more emotional stress and growth in the past 10 days then i've had in the past 10 years. hyperbole? sure, i'd love a slice.


Last night I had a fabu time with La____. We hung out in Lincoln Square and she bought records, including the duet albums of Kris Kristofferson and Rita Coolidge. Then we went to a restaurant with good burgers and fries, and I smoked way more than I should have (i.e. at all), but it's more fun when I'm sharing it with someone. I probably won't have one for the next 4 days or so anyway. On the ride home I called Mr. Ridley and was one of those annoying people on the train who talks on their cell phone. But I sat far away from people and didn't talk loudly. Though one guy stared at me the whole time (I didn't tell Ridley this at the time). But I realized that I'm used to talking on the phone at home where I gesticulate wildly and talk very animatedly (fag!), and even though I was showing some restraint in public, it still might have been interesting to watch. Anyway, I had to end the convo a bit early and pay attention to MelRo and find out how her first day of school went. In exciting news, she found out yesterday that she won the Stonewall scholarship from the school, which is awesome. Yay for money for being gay and wanting to do gay law.

I finally finished Li__'s bday gift last night and gave it to her this morning. Just before Virgo passed on....

Last night we had a terrific thunderstorm here in the city -- LOTS of lightning, and hard rain that sounds so good when lying in the dark by the window. And today it's sunny and cool. I'm wearing a sweater today -- a dark grey v-neck which used to be my favorite. Now it's very large on me, which is unfortunate. But I'll still wear it -- I guess it's been demoted from my evening wear collection and into my casual wear wardrobe.

{The dictionary.com word of the day is maunder. Coincidence? I think not.)

So tonight I'm going to Second City with MelRo and some law school folks. I've actually never been, which is weird since I've been in Chicago for 6 years.

Last night I had a weird ES dream, involving me dating this friend of Melanie. And there was all this drama, and at one point, one of her other friends asked me why I had to make things so complicated by getting involved with more than one person. Hmm. There were some other bizarre things that went on too, that I can't remember super-clearly -- on the vague plot and my emotional responses. But it was definitely one of those dreams where every person in the dream represented me. Especially the person chastising me for "making trouble", I believe is how they put it. I guess you could say it was an anxiety dream, but it wasn't THAT stressful. It just had a couple stresfful moments. For the most part it was typical Raymond Johnson fare -- I complicated long-winded narrative in Robert Altman style with WAY too much happening to WAY too many people. I love it.

Ok, it's taken me an hour to write this, because it's long, and also because I keep taking breaks to do work...and other things. Now I should turn my full-time attention to other things....

And for the other weird ass geeks in the house, if you can correctly interpret my subject line, I'll be your baby daddy. Oooh! Whatta prize! There's a hint contained in another part of this post.

Comments

well...

[clockwatcher.livejournal.com]

you did write me first ;) talk to you soon and thanks!

jessie

[ridleymae.livejournal.com]

jessE is the "man's" spelling of the name ;)

not to be a stickler . . . :)
ridlEy (ha)

[raybear.livejournal.com]

technically, I've seen both spellings with both genders, but I won't question, daddy. ;)

rayE

Names

[ex-jesseboi461.livejournal.com]

If you really wanted to, you could. But Jesse with an E, is a "man's" name straight from the bible (y'know, the Jesse tree) and Jessie with an I is derived from Jessica. But because Jessica is such a popular name recently, when you say Jess or Jesse or Jessie they usually assume you are a "girl". But I am Jesse, named after my grandpa Jesse (if you wanted to know, heh).

Re: Names

[raybear.livejournal.com]

Now that I think about it (and after reading what you said), i think i've seen the name "Jesse" associated with men and women, but "Jessie" I've seen traditionally with women.

I did know the biblical origin -- my first name is Aaron which as you probably know has biblical (specifically Hebrew) roots.....and seems to be a pretty damn common transguy name too, I've found recently. (I actually tried to get my parents to call me Aaron, instead of Raymond, since the southern pronounciation of vowels doesn't leave much disctinction between Aaron and Erin....)

When I started going by Ray, I never really thought of it as "gender-neutral" but I often would get people (when I was pre-transition) who would spell it "Rae". This further confused me, since my association is with Rae is Raekwon from Wu-Tang Clan.

Re: Names

[clockwatcher.livejournal.com]

It's interesting... I HATE it when people call me Jess but I think that Jessie/Jesse (the pronunciation, not how it is actually spelled) is relatively gender neutral and not necessarily feminized, although i've never thought of it. I don't mind when people spell my name Jessie or Jesse, but I HATE it when it's Jesse!

a non female (or male) identified...

Jessie

better recognize!!

[ridleymae.livejournal.com]

that's right! don't question DADDY! or little bears will have to be disciplined ;)

say it: Yes sir :)

that's Mr Ridley (if you're nasty)

Re: better recognize!!

[raybear.livejournal.com]

yes sir!!