Its a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world

[raybear]

I need to come out about something. I really, really dislike the use of the word "tranny/trannie". I'm not even talking about that Project Runway dude. I'm talking about my friends and neighbors.

I'm more okay if its used to describe some sort of event/space/concept that is about being intentionally provocative, like "Trannyshack" in SF. I'm not okay with it being used a general noun or descriptor of a category of people, e.g. "you could come, its full of trannies!!" or even things like "tranny yoga class" or "tranny dance night." Even if this is supposedly being used as a positive selling point. If a trans person uses it self-referentially, I don't notice as much, since I respect any homos right to call themselves a fag, a dyke, a lesbian, a queer, etc. But non-trans people saying it really gives me the willies the most. Its like all the gross fetish buttons get lit up on my emotional switchboard.

So, I'm curious to know what others think.

[Poll #1226144]

Please don't be shy about checking any box, as all of them are things I've thought myself while pondering this question.

Comments

[trooper6.livejournal.com]

"I didn't mean to imply that it is the minorities' role to educate. But, if we are going to have a better world, that's partially the way it's going to happen. People simply don't care about things that they have no interest in. That's a part of human nature. They may listen for a bit, but at the end of the day, if it doesn't affect them, it's yesterday's news. That's why we need minorities to help us understand how these issues affect us, affect the community and the world at large.

I wish it weren't that way."

Then take heart. Because it isn't always that way. If it really were that way, then we wouldn't have had the Quakers creating the underground railroad, or AWARE (Allied White Women Against Racism through Education), or MAR (Men Against Rape), or any number of other organizations. There are lots of examples of people in the majority who don't know any minority people in specific who went out of their way to educate themselves and make change. Those white kids from segregated all white neighborhoods who when on the freedom rides...some of whom got killed for their activism...springs to mind.

Our history is filled with people in the majority who didn't have to educate themselves and work tirelessly for the rights of people not-them. People who didn't rely on the minority to approach them first. Who took it upon themselves to do something...maybe out of religious reasons or who knows why.

I tend to have a much more hopeful view of humanity than you are stating in your posts. I believe that people are not fundamentally selfish. I believe that people are generally interested in others...and empathetic. I don't think that people generally get their kick putting down others. I expect the best out of people. And that means I expect them to educate themselves on matters once it becomes apparent they need to. And to step up apologize when they've hurt someone. I treat people they way I want to be treated. And I try to be the change I wish to see. That means, educating myself on topics I'm ignorant about. Listening when people freak out on me. Caring. And expecting others to rise to similar humane standards.

Oh by the way, you said: But the point is, we have to try to keep emotion out of the discussion.

I have found emotion to be one of the only ways to reach people who are hurtful. To get them to be empathetic by appealing to their emotions. If I say, "That statement could be construed as upsetting to transgender people because it dehumanizes them" The person I'm talking to often shrugs and says, "No it doesn't" or "I didn't mean to." But when I say, with feeling, "You have hurt me" -- that is harder to shrug off. It's like when someone has been kidnapped, it is recommended to humanize the victim, play on emotion to try to get the kidnapper to engage emotionally. Being too rational can make it too easy that we are talking about people...can make it all too abstract...and then too easy to justify hurtful behavior.

Of course, if you are succuessful in your social justice work appealing to logic only, good on you, and keep up the good work.