The Livejournal Participation Hour

I've been jonesing for watching a movie in the theatre, and I think Pan's Labrynth would be the best investment. I could go for a visually stunning immersion into another world. So I'm going on Saturday to Landmark to see it, most likely the late afternoon or early evening. In case anyone out there randomly would like to go too...

Last night at work, it was pretty quiet so I spent half the time reading a website teaching kids to play chess. I think it was really poorly designed for kids, and seemed to perhaps have been illustrated solely with clip art found in a Microsoft program. But pretty informative for even adults. I'm working on my Scholar's Mate defense as we speak. I decided recently that I wanted to learn how to really play chess, not just move the pieces around, as I already know how to do. I hesitate to mention it here, because I suspect most people are either a) bored to tears at the thought of playing chess with a beginner because they are already a grandmaster or b) bored to tears at the thought of playing chess, period. But you know, just in case I'm wrong, I'm mentioning it anyway.

I wasn't thrilled that I had to plunk down several bucks to get a new meditation cushion, but at least the new one has a removable cover for easy washing. I know I'm supposed to keep my mat as a clean and sacred space, but those that decree that obviously don't live in a home without its own meditation room and with an ill-trained dog that I allow on all the furniture. So the ability to clean it on occasion is a very good thing. Basically the other one, well, I thought it was filled with synthetic bean bag beads. No, it was some sort of buckwheat hulls which completely melted and stained everything from the inside out when put in the dryer after washing. Not my brightest move, I admit, but what can you do. In some ways, these moments of fcking up are when I'm pleased to remember that I'm an adult and I don't have to worry about anyone coming down hard on me to teach me some sort of lesson of responsibility. Not all mistakes fall into this category still, there are plenty of people in life who are effected. So in some ways I'm grateful when I'm the only one who's the victim. Well, me and the personified ruined meditiation cushion that is now in the garbage can.

Messing around with you is going to get me life.

After an insightful IM conversation with limenal (which weirded me out slightly, seeing as saw her just yesterday morning but now she's back in San Fran), I was doing some therapeutic googling -- where in lieu of talking to a live therapist, one googles random psychological issues I wonder about and look into self-diagnosis, even though at this moment I think I've decided I've gone as far as I can right this second on my own and need some additional help, but that's another post. But of course the attorney I was helping that night kept coming up on occasion to give me more pages to edit and my hands kept forgetting how to "alt-tab" and I'm sure my fumbling just drew attention to the various woowoo sites I was on. I could just make the snarky comment about "why should I care? She's working every night past 9 pm and has revealed at other times her own set of quirks and insecurities", but it would be sort of inaccurate. I do care, partly because I kind of like her. She's terribly weird and not my favorite attorney to give me a project as far as her style of working, but personality-wise, I don't know, I sort of connect to her weirdness.

I think I'll do some more prostrations. Perhaps I should finish this glass of wine first.